Mirrored from the latest entry in Daron's Guitar Chronicles.
ctan: Okay, so yesterday, we finished one whole section of DGC. Any comments about that?
Daron: No comment. Well, it’s actually that I can’t comment without giving spoilers. You’ll all find out what I did next after you find out what Ziggy did next. That’s all I’m allowed to say. You should tell people about Best Bi Short Stories, though.
ctan: Ah yes! Launching today, a Kickstarter campaign to raise money to pay the authors in Best Bi (Bisexual) Short Stories. It’s going live today. Here: Kickstarter. Let’s do Ziggy proud.
Daron: Speaking of lead singers with ego problems, I’d like to complain about Morrissey.
ctan: Again?
Daron: Yes. You know I already have a thing against him for doing everything he could to push Johnny Marr, Smiths guitarist, out of the spotlight, eventually breaking up the band to pursue a solo career…
ctan: I could see why you might be… sensitive about that sort of thing happening, but what’s got you upset now?
Daron: So, Morrissey’s autobiography was published last year. It became one of the bestselling books in the U.K. It was also released here in the U.S. Apparently he didn’t like that people were talking about the part of the book THAT HE WROTE where he talks about a gay relationship he had. SO HE MADE THEM EDIT IT OUT and now it’s gone from the book. And he felt the need to issue a statement that he is “not a homosexual.” I feel the need to kick him in the balls. Except I guess he doesn’t have any.
ctan: You’re saying no one else, including you, has ever wished they could go back into the closet?
Daron: No. I’m saying what the fucking fuck. Okay, rant over. But let’s not use any more of his songs, okay? Hearing his voice turns me into a ragemonster.
ctan: I sincerely swear I’ve never thought about the Smiths or Morrissey half as much as I have in the past few months. You’ve become obsessed about them.
Daron: Whatever. Let’s talk about someone much more deserving of time. Like Mdou Moctar.
ctan: Explain.
Daron: Have you heard of the Tuareg people, so-called “nomads of the Sahara”?
ctan: Only in passing.
Daron: Mdou Moctar is a Tuareg guitarist and apparently there’s a big history with the Tuaregs and the guitar, and now he’s starring in a film being Kickstarted loosely based on “Purple Rain.” Kickstarter ends TODAY, in fact. Watch:
ctan: That is cool. I just hope Prince doesn’t sue them. Speaking of flamboyant lead singers whose former band members complain bitterly about…
Daron: Seriously. Did you ever read the interview with Wendy and Lisa dishing on him? I love Prince. Don’t get me wrong. As a musician, as a band leader, he’s unimpeachable. But as a human being? Well, I guess once you lose your grip on reality because your ego’s so big, it’s hard to treat other people well. Here’s a link to the interview in OUT Magazine, where Wendy & Lisa call Prince “a fancy lesbian.” http://www.out.com/entertainment/2009/04/16/revolution-will-be-harmonized
ctan: They seem amazingly well grounded for two girls who joined Prince’s band when they were only 19.
Daron: Hey. Watch it with the “only 19” comments.
ctan: Right. Sorry.
Daron: Another bit of news from the international music scene, which is relevant to the recent chapters in Hiroshima, did you see this? “Celebrated Japanese composer Mamoru Samuragochi, often hailed as a Japanese Beethoven because of his deafness, abruptly confessed on February 5 that he has been paying a ghostwriter to write most of his work since the ’90s.” Link to SPIN: http://www.spin.com/articles/japanese-composer-mamoru-samuragochi-deaf-fraud-ghostwriter/
ctan: Wow.
Daron: Not only that… the ghostwriter claims he’s NOT EVEN DEAF.
ctan: So the claims of going deaf were, what, a publicity ploy? Or was that how he convinced the ghostwriter to start writing his music in the first place?
Daron: Nothing I’ve seen yet actually tells how it all got started.
ctan: But what an angst-filled gay romance novel that would make!
Daron: YOU. Have a one-track mind.
ctan: Me? Okay, how’s this for a change of pace then. I know we usual share totally awesome guitar videos but it’s about time for a drumming one. Drumming and juggling:
Daron: Okay, that means we have to show this one that has juggling with a hammer-style guitar solo, though:
ctan: I’ll see your hammer-style guitar solo with juggling and add fire:
Daron: Cool! What I think is funny is he played the same solo every time! Like he actually had a specific solo in mind and took three tries to get it right. I approve. Okay, while we’re having a YouTube Party, corwin shared this and I wanted to pass it on. It’s Dolly Parton’s “Jolene” slowed down 25%. Her singing range is so high this makes it sound like a guy singing a really great folk version:
Daron: What’s lame is a couple of other artists have now performed covers of the song where they’re basically just singing it slowly. No one has tried to recreate the slow finger-picking which makes the guitar part so awesome. And a decent fingerpicker really could.
ctan: “Fingerpicking” always sound like something obscene.
Daron: You think that about everything. Hey, can I dish on Sebastian Bach now?
ctan: Former lead singer of, uh, what band again?
Daron: Skid Row. Got into so much trouble when he was like 20 in the 80s. But in particular I’m thinking of how he was “caught” in 1989 wearing a T-shirt that said “AIDS Kills Fags Dead.”
ctan: Why are you bringing him up now?
Daron: I follow the motherfucker on Twitter and he just posted a photo of himself partying with Lance Bass for Grammy weekend. Gay Lance Bass. Granted, Bach did put two pretty women between them, but check out the Instagram Bach posted. http://instagram.com/p/jljreMyjM5/
ctan: Maybe he realizes the error of his ways.
Daron: Maybe he realizes that these days Lance Bass is a bigger star than he is.
ctan: Oh snap. I can’t remember now. Did we already share the Youtube video where Henry Rollins and RuPaul drive through L.A. together and RuPaul gives him advice on his crappy love life?
Daron: If we did, let’s do it again:
Daron: I’m a little fascinated by Henry Rollins, who has clearly gotten sucked into this Hollywood reality where his ego itself is the star of the show. Like, it has a separate dressing room.
ctan: This is the guy who started a publishing house and named it with the numbers of his birthday. 2.13.61
Daron: I’m not saying Rollins is bad, mind you. Just… on a different planet from the rest of us sometimes. Not that we don’t know plenty of people like that. Amy pointed us at this op ed piece he wrote on why the guitar will never be supplanted as the ultimate rock and roll instrument: http://blogs.villagevoice.com/music/2014/01/the_guitar_will_never_die_henry_rollins_pazz_and_jop.php
“The appeal of guitar music will never die. There, I have predicted the future, and it’s full of guitars. It is the most mass produced and sold instrument in the world and works just fine electric or acoustic. It is an instrument that is easily enjoyed alone to preserve one’s sanity. It’s one of humankind’s best inventions.”
ctan: Okay, wait, but back up, I want to talk about how Henry Rollins, at age 50-something, says to RuPaul that every one of his relationships has failed after two months.
Daron: I really don’t want to talk about failed relationships of rock stars right now.
ctan: Yeah, okay. Is the subject of lead singers who went solo off limits, too?
Daron: Why, whatcha got?
ctan: Did you know that the guy who is now the lead singer of Journey is filipino? Arnel Pineda. And they made a documentary about him. Here’s a clip of him meeting the guy who replaced Pete Cetera in Chicago. http://www.rollingstone.com/music/videos/dont-stop-believin-everymans-journey-tracks-lead-singers-rise-to-stardom-20130213#ixzz2KpM7j14Y
Daron: Wow. Mind blown.
ctan: Apparently Neal Schon found him on YouTube singing Journey covers and decided to hire him when the most recent guy who replaced Steve Perry left.
Daron: I had no idea that the “Rock Star” method worked for other bands, too. I knew about the guy in Judas Priest, the one they based the Mark Wahlberg movie on.
ctan: We talked about that over three years ago. (http://daron.ceciliatan.com/archives/866) Show the trailer again so people know what we’re talking about.
Daron: Here. From 2001.
ctan: Definitely one of the best movies about rock and roll ever made. But all I remember is it was the first movie we watched after 9/11. First time we left the house after the attack. We needed to see something that wasn’t too heavy.
Daron: Speaking of heavy, sorry about all the atomic bomb stuff. But it really affects a person. And the whole thing about how we and Russia had enough bombs to destroy the entire human race 200 times over, that stuff was real, you know.
ctan: I know. It’s all right.
Daron: Here, have a video of the Swedish Marine corps doing a video cover of John Travolta’s “Greased Lightning” from the movie Grease.
ctan: There’s no topping that. I’m going to give folks a little something to think about now, before they start reading Ziggy’s Diary.
Daron: Okay, what?
ctan: Here’s a quote from a Guardian article by Crystal Chan that came out on Chinese New Year:
“When you’re a mixed race person in a monoracial world, you learn that it’s hard, if not impossible, to fit in as you are, so you learn to take on the identities of those around you.”
Daron: That describes Ziggy pretty well.
ctan: Or me. Here’s more:
“You also learn that the lines of race and culture aren’t solid. They blur. They shift depending on the context… Interestingly, these lines are hard and fast for everyone else–so monoracial people tend to stay in their boxes while you hop in and out, depending on the situations, depending on the need.”
Daron: But aren’t well all sort of mutts?
ctan: Maybe, but most people don’t think of themselves as such. I think most people, if they can fit themselves into a box comfortably, whether that box is “white” or “gay” or “straight,” will do that. Ziggy’s been forced his whole life to be straddling the edges between the boxes. He’s proud of his ability to do so. That’s his identity, in fact–he sees himself as above the boxes, tightrope walking on those edges, looking down into the boxes other people have to live in. His chameleon nature, his ability to hop from one box to the other–he considers that his superpower.
Daron: I’m just not that flexible.
ctan: You don’t have to be, dear. Why don’t you finish up with a sound-alike?
Daron: Sure. Have you heard Haim’s “The Wire”?
Daron: You may notice the fake hand-claps are essentially right from The Eagles, “Heartache Tonight.” And they use a little Joe Walsh-like guitar riff, too.
Daron: Note though, that otherwise, the Haim song is COMPLETELY DIFFERENT in construction and style. Which makes me wonder, what was the point in using such an obvious riff from something else?
ctan: Other than it seems like it’s actually trendy to have your song sound like an older song?
Daron: Um. I guess you’re right. That’s a thing now. Which is why we keep finding so many of these.
ctan: Yeah. What are you going to do when someone decides to borrow the opening riff from Candlelight?
Daron: Sue them. No, just kidding. But just because I wouldn’t doesn’t mean that my record company or song publisher might not sue anyway, like Sting’s publishers did with Dire Straits “Money for Nothing.” We talked about that one already a year ago.
ctan: Yeah. All right, time for you to take a vacation.
Daron: It’s not a vacation!
ctan: I know, dear. Can’t help but goose you in the nads when I can, though. So, readers, starting tomorrow, we’ll be presenting Ziggy’s Diary. Ziggy’s Diary posts are going to be EVERY DAY Mondays through Fridays, leaving the weekends for folks to catch up. It’ll run through March 28th. Daron won’t be around while that’s going on. I’ll still be here to answer comments, though. I *don’t* think Ziggy will be answering them… This is his mysterious and inscrutable phase. Once the diary has run its course, we’ll pick up with Daron’s narration again, and the beginning of a new plot arc!
Daron: And a new Kickstarter campaign? To do the next omnibus book?
ctan: Yes, but that’s later. Say bye for now.
Daron: Bye for now. See you on the other side.