A story I wrote for my lover who has died. RIP Brian.

[ceciliatan]

Brian and Tai Gau

I have no idea what to write here, but I feel I must do something, say something. I learned a short while ago that my long-distance lover and significant other, Brian Wolfe (aka Ayem Willing), was killed in a motorcycle accident. Some of you knew him through the Fetish Fair Fleamarkets where he was the man who kept me upright when I was so ill I could barely function to run the show in Houston and who volunteered tirelessly for NELA and other BDSM organizations. He was an unrelentingly good person, who gave and gave and gave of himself. No, really.

I don’t know any details about the accident. What I can tell you is that the lest time I saw him, at the end of June, was that the motorcycle was his only transportation. He got laid off from his job a while back when the economy tanked, and in the economic difficulties that followed, he told me he could not keep up his car payments. Despite trying to cut a deal with them to repay (once he got another job), the repo men kept showing up, so he finally gave in and told them to “just take the damn car.” That left him only on two wheels.

I don’t know any details about the accident. I don’t know if there was a collision or if it was a solo accident, or not. All I can fixate on is that this was pretty much the last conversation I had with him.

As you can imagine, I’m pretty devastated by the news. I’m also pretty tender, so although I appreciate condolences, I don’t think I can actually handle them right now. So please don’t call me. Please do celebrate the life of a man who had strong passions and who wasn’t afraid to pursue them.

To that end, I have an erotic story to share, that I wrote for Brian a few years ago. (Story under the cut if you are interested in reading it.) Brian won a fundraising eBay auction back in 2007 for an original story written by me. So this has never been posted anywhere before. His request was for a sequel to The Velderet, my BDSM space opera novel, asking about what happened to two of the characters who end up together at the end of the novel.

I share the story with you all now, in his memory.

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Mirrored from blog.ceciliatan.com.